Let Them In
by Hanako Miyuki
Summary: A What If fic dealing with a possible aftermath, based on an Edwin McCain song based on a poem. R&R, k? It's been so long since I wrote a fic... ^_~


> AN: I was looking for the lyrics to I'll Be by Edwin McCain because I so loved the song, and accidentally found this other song. Well... it just reminded me so much of the G-boys, and I couldn't help but write this. Oh, and I don't know when the hell this takes place. Probably before the end of war? ^_^ I hope you like it.
> 
> Disclaimers apply [DUH!]. GW characters not mine, the song Prayer to St. Peter is by Edwin McCain. I don't own that either. Don't sue me, k?
> 
> * * *

Let Them In  
By [Slumber][1]

They hadn't survived. 

It had been such a hopeless cause, such a desperate war, but it's realities just didn't sink in. I don't think any of them ever really realized the gravity of war. Or how their lives really *were* at stake. How easily they could get fatally hurt and injured. 

Or maybe they *did* know, just that they didn't exactly care. 

They had always been puzzles to solve. I never really understood how they worked. How they were able to accept their roles as mass murderers.

Maybe they covered it up by pretending it was for the good of all.

It *is* for the good of all... but must they give up *their* innocence, *their* lives... their *selves* in the process?

Sometimes I feel life really *is* unfair. That the Powers-That-Be really do nothing except play with us. That Fate is nothing but a cruel sadist, for who would want to inflict such heavy a burden as winning a damn *war*... on mere children?

Not that I can do anything about it now.

They've thrown themselves into it recklessly, giving what they have to. Doing what is necessary.

Maybe it was because that's the only way of life they knew. How else would they be able to risk everything for a cause they probably had nothing to do with in the first place?

Or maybe they had nothing to lose. After all, they had no identities before the war.

Jaded. Cynical. I hate to see what war has turned them into. And I hate even more the fact that I can do nothing about it.

That I wasn't able to do anything about it.

Now is too late, of course.

The battle had been too hard to fight, the enemies too many to defeat all at once. And their concern for innocent citizens had cost them their lives.

I always thought the scientists hadn't at all been too perfect in training them to be real soldiers. They were still human, still managed to maintain a bit of humanity in them through all the blood and cruelty surrounding them.

I guess I should give them credit for that, at least. No ordinary human would manage to remain sane after all those boys had seen and had been forced to do.

At least their efforts had not been too much in vain.

At least we found their bodies afterward, that we may be able to give them a decent burial.

Softly, I sigh and look around. Soft drizzles of rain had started to fall, but no one moved from where they stood crowded around five freshly dug graves. The ceremony managed to retain its solemnity as I started to initiate some semblance of a rite to officially put them to rest.

Try as I might, though, I just could not look at them as they are right now. It just didn't seem right to think of them as dead. 

I turned away from the bodies covered in cloth. I don't want to see the boys who had valiantly fought for the sake of a bunch of cowards. Instead I focus on the girl standing next to me, sniffling at the loss of love-that-could-have-been. 

I pity her. I don't think she realizes just how lucky these boys are now that they have been rid of the hellhole called the world. Then again, it must hurt to lose someone you loved. Even the others are trying to blink back tears. Everyone had lost someone that day they died. A hero, a savior, a comrade, a brother, a friend...

I started to speak as five boys were laid in eternal peace, drops of heaven lying with them.

_"Let them in Peter"_

Would the heavens actually open their doors for five young men who had lived their lives killing others mercilessly, even if it was to save people? Does the end truly justify the means?

I'm afraid to answer that question, but it could also be that the only way for evil to conquer is for a good man to let it happen. Had they done the right thing in not letting injustice conquer by retaliating?

_"For they are very tired.  
Give them couches where the angels sleep"_

Eternal sleep and slumber. Peace at last has been granted them. It is one thing we should be happy for. They have fought, they have given themselves, thrown themselves into such absurdity...

They deserve to rest.

Maybe heaven *will* open its door to them.

_"And light those fires  
Let them wake whole again"_

To wherever they may go right now, I know they are happy. They *will* be happy.

For wherever they may go to right now, they will find themselves.

_"To brand new dawns   
Fired by the sun   
Not war-times bloody guns"_

Catherine and Iria have both broken their stone facades now, and started crying silently. It must hurt the most for them, I think.

'Off to a better place... off to a better tomorrow...' Iria murmurs, as if to soothe herself.

'Off to rest your tired soul... off to embrace genuine laughter...' Catherine adds quietly.

'Quatre.'

_"May their peace be deep"_

'Rest yourself, Trowa.'

_"Remember where the broken bodies lie   
God knows how young they were  
To have to die"_

I shut my eyes tightly as I felt the tears threatening to spill forth and join the droplets that now cover our faces, mixing salty tears with fresh rain.

Children... just children. Barely old enough to be worthy of going through the whole gory human ritual they call war.

They had so much in them. So many possibilities could have come from them. Sadly, everything was wasted.

_"Give them things they like   
Let them make some noise   
Give dance hall bands not golden harps   
To these our boys"_

Our boys. A tear rolls down when I take a look at the five graves.

They had missed so much because of what they had to go through. They had put so much aside. They had sacrificed greatly just for their cause.

Yet even if that may be the case... I would not be able to know whether or not it really is worth it.

They deserve so much more... 

_"Let them love Peter  
For they've had no time"_

'Come back...' Relena whispers beside me, almost as if to the empty air.

They never had the chances boys their age had, they never had the experiences they should have had...

They never got what they deserved.

'Please come back to me...'

There are times when all you can do is sigh, and regret. Regret for what was, and what could have been.

Regret is all we can do now.

'Heero...'

_"They should have bird songs and trees  
And hills to climb   
The taste of summer  
And a ripened pear"_

Youth. They probably had never been young. They had been pushed into a world of chaos.

A lot had been taken from them, and I doubt they even minded.

You don't know what you've missed, I supposed...

'I will miss you...' Hilde manages to choke out.

Until you've had it.

'Duo...'

At least these boys... our boys... did not see how it was to be naive and innocent. They can't miss what they don't know.

_"And girls sweet as meadow wind   
And flowing hair"_

Love that could have been, had war not stood in the way. Even that they had missed. Even that they had given up.

They have put their souls, their beings aside.

It is time they got those back.

_"And tell them how they are missed   
But say not to fear"_

May heaven care for them, and put them under her wings.

May they find contentment where they are. May they be at peace at last.

May they let go of their past and receive what they are worthy of.

_"It's gonna be all right   
With us down here"_

The rain falls steadily, unnoticed, blanketing the fresh ground.

We will continue the fight and make sure the hope they have sparked in the rebels be burning for as long as it needs to.

We will win this war yet. They deserve at least that. We won't let them down.

We'll take care of the world they died for.

It's going to be fine down here. *We're* going to be fine down here, looking up to you. You will continue to shine as beacons of hope even after you've gone.

Don't worry over us. Be happy where you are.

Wufei...

**OWARI**

* * *

This is what you get when you take away my muses and don't give them back. ::shrugs:: Guess whose point of view this one is, but it's probably pretty obvious.

Did it seem like a Christian burial? Gomen ne, that's the only type of burial I know of... and anyway, at least I didn't use a priest.

Sorry for killing them all off, though, I hope you don't tell me this is angst, cause I don't think it is. Then again, this is me we're talking about, so maybe it probably is. I never really know. And remember minna, read and *REVIEW*, k? ^_~ [At *least* congratulate me for being able to write again, even if it may be sucky.]

   [1]: mailto:hanako_miyuki@yahoo.com



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